My Experience with Blogging

In my point of view this is the best invention for the internet, blogging that is. Blogs are used for online thoughts and feelings, freedom of speech, and to connect with people from all over the world. They are also used to stay up to date with the media, the pop stars and what’s going on in the world. Blogging was really fun, but I rather blog on my own time, and what I mean by that is, I felt like we as the English 109.02 class, were somewhat forced to write blogs; it was a requirement. Although Blogging is an online place to free yourself, people should watch what they say and do on there just for the sake of their identity.

When I was introduced to this blogger site, I didn’t know what to write about because I hate writing when I’m asked to do so. Because I only thought about my identity, form of security, I didn’t want to do the assignment and wasn’t going to do it.

Reading new and old blogs I came across some guy, zx6rider, who talked about his baby being on the way. We had some things in common and I really like his choice of words and one thing he said in his blogging experience stood out, “When people comment on my post it gives me the feeling that they are understanding what I'm going through and give me advice.” When I stopped at this statement I knew exactly how he felt because I learned to let go of my fears and open up to the internet.

My experience with blogging was really fun and I learned a lot during these last couple of quarters about it. When we started blogging in English 109.01 I was comfortable with writing personal things on the internet because it wasn’t me, it was some made up person on MySpace I created. Because I had to be myself on Blogger, I was so uncomfortable and it was like I was always forced to write my personal thoughts.

The whole blogging was very exciting because I was anxious to see what my peers would write about every week; however I didn’t want anyone seeing mine. I later learned to have fun with blogging and it really wasn’t a big deal as I made it seem. Blogging is very fun and experimental; you learn to trust the internet and the people who are going to be reading your personal thoughts.

Coming up with a topic was a bit of a struggle for me because I wanted to talk about everything. I wanted to talk about being a college student, having a miscarriage, and my friends, but they all seemed to easy to talk about and I eventually found out that those were some of the similar topics my peers were talking about. Well I narrowed it all down to one, Bad Relationships!

Talking about bad relationships came to me easy like a well trained pup goes to his owner. Going through and seeing a lot of hurtful relationships, I wanted to tell my story and help others who were afraid to tell about going through the same experience as I was. Keeping and update on this guy named John Shore was deep and heart touching because I would never think of a guy being able to understand the pain women endure by the abusive spouses. “In their heart of hearts, many women believe that initiating and securing a permanent separation from their former Mr. Right means irrevocably transmogrifying from the Selfless Conciliator they’ve always been,”…etc. This is a quote from John Shore. Looking back at all the work I accomplished in English 109.01 and 109.02, I can truly say I am a blogger now! Enjoying everything we did as an class with the commenting, coming up with new post, giving advice and getting to know one another more has been really fun, also I am going to continue to blog on blogger, hope o hear from you guys in the future on here chow.

Works Cited

Shore, John. “Reason #2 Women Stay in Bad Relationships.”
The Fear Factor. 09 February 2009. 09 March 2009.< http://www.crosswalk.com/blogs/johnshore/11599412/.>

Life, New. “My Blogging Experience.”
New Life. 10 March 2008. 03 March 2009.< http://99zx6rider.blogspot.com/2008/03/my-blogging-experience.html.>

My experience on guest blogging...

Well writing a blog for someone else was really fun and I got the opportunity to fill someone else shoes for a little minute. It really didnt feel different to me at all because I somewhat understood what she wrote her blog on.

As a person who likes to write, especially over things I like to write about, it was very easy for me to act as Heather in her blogs because I can write about dancing, but the only thing that was different was our writing. It was hard for me because I seriously dont know how to write in noone else style or language.

In my English class last quarter we did something similar like this. We had to make up characters on MySpace and my characters name was Celeste, it was difficult writing for her because we were opposition and I always wanted to write in my style when writing for her.I can truly say that was really hard for me.

This was fun and again it really wasnt different to me because it was just like writing in my own style.

Guest Blogging Experiment

This time, picture yourself in a good relationship. Close your eyes and imagine that one person who always brings a smile to your face. You can't have a bad time with them no matter what you are doing. You're always on each others mind and you can't wait till the next time you see them. Could this ever be you? Once again, "never say never." I believe there is someone like this for everyone. I believe if you are patient enough, you can find this person. It is all just a matter of time and patience. Once again, I haven't got much to say. I know that with time, I will find the right person. I'm not in a hurry. I know that that person will come someday. And when that day comes, it will be a happy day.

Open thought's

Just picture yourself in a bad relationship or maybe picture youself as the abuser...Go into deep thought and express your feelings as you hit your partner or as your partner hits you, think about not just the physical abuse, but the verbal abuse also. Would you want to go through the pain, stress, and daily beatings?

Could this ever be you? You know the saying "never say never," well dont ever say never because I used to say "I'll never let someone treat me like that," lol no one can predict the future, but one sure can pick the person they want to be with for the rest of their life.

Even though I let my ex-boyfriend go, I still think of him a lot because there were some good times we had, but I rather do bad all by myself than to let someone look down upon me just to build their ego up.

Well I haven't got much to say today and I certainly want to get through someone's if their going through the same thing as me, just read my lastest blogs and read what I had to say and also make sure you check out the blog I plan on following for the next couple of weeks. John Shore is a very important man to me now because I am taking very good pointers from him and you should too!

Chow for now, Lil' Bit

~!*A Follow Up On John Shore*!~

In my blog I will tell you a little about a guy named John Shore; he is an editor, a writer and a author. In his blog he talks about why women stay in bad relationships and how women should get out of a bad relationship. Also he talks about how women blam Eve for all their curses because most women do believe Eve is the reason why women go through so much drama in life. Shore wrote a whole book on Eve and why women thinks she cursed them and its called: Women In Bad Relationships: Eve's Curse Isn't Yours.

He goes on to say how men want to be in control and in power, "And men crave power so much that they'll take it in virtually any form they can get it. And they won't give up an iota of their power that they don't absolutely have to...etc" Isn't this a sign ladies??? Have you ever been through or seen something like this happen and couldn't help but notice that this is very much truly? I mean women do this too, but every so ofthen. As women we are the most important human being because without us who can men depend on? How can they make babies without us?

The way this man speaks is stupendous! I've learned quite a lot from this guy in over a matter of days you guys! He has a way with his words and he breaks them down so we as the readers can understand where he's coming from, and how he interprets it.

I've longed to find someone who can understand my pain, hurt and stress that I went through with my previous relationship because it seemed like any one who I talked to about it didn't really understand how I felt. That's why I want to talk about bad relationships in my blogs because I want to get through to someone else just as someone got through me and I would like to ask you guys to go to his pasge and check it out because he really gives great advice on bad relationships. If you could vist: http://www.crosswalk.com/blogs/johnshore/2009/2/17/

The Top 4 Reasons For a Wonderful Relationship

1. Respect- When your in a relationship, it's supposed to be about trust, loving one another and the big key factor of all is respect. If you dont respect yourself, how in the world do you expect someone else to repsect you? Think about it.
2. Trust- Ah ha...trust, who can you trust now days? Basically, no one in my opinion you have to gain trust. When going into a relationship, whether its with friends, girls, or guys one has to work on gaining someones trust and keeping it there throughout the whole relationship.
3. Fun- Who doesn't want to have fun in a relationship? One thing a couple should always do, have FUN! It'll make the relationship way better and you'll be closer to your significate other.
4. Talking- This is one thing my ex-boyfriend did not want to do. I couldnt talked to him about nothing because he would always criticize me and tell me to stop talking to him about stupid things. As young people we go through a lot right, and we need someone to talk to. With him I stop talking to him about my personal life because I found out he would go back and tell others about my most secretive talks with him. I then realized we had no kind of trust in this relationship and without trust you have nothing.

My Not so Comfort Zone

Have you ever experienced any rocky relationships, whether it was yours or not? Did you always think it was your fault the relationships turned out the way they did? Seeing and experiencing many relationships with guys, I’ve got a lot to express. A relationship is one of the best experiences to go through because one could learn from their experience and/or mistakes, that way they can reach out to someone else who is in the same predicament. People should set their standards and explore both who they are and who they are having a relationship with.

Previously a family member of mine had a crazy relationship with a guy that use to beat her, treat her like a wild animal, and talk to her roughly. Growing up around that rough environment made me think that was how females to be treated, so I was also treated like that in some of my relationships, in the past, and in the present.

This relationship I had with this guy, whose name I’m going to keep anonymous, I’ve been in for two years has been horrible, but don’t get me wrong the first half of it was oh so wonderful. After Mr. Anonymous felt like he had me where he wanted me to be, our relationship just started getting out of hand.

A couple of times my friends and I were going out to the club just to have fun and he would be there with his friends also, but knowing the type of person he is and the attitude he has I should have been smart and left. Well he would snatch me up to tell me he better not see me dancing by myself, with my friends or with no guys. The thoughts that are running through my head are “Who does this mother fucker thinks he is and who does he thinks he’s talking to? Why would I come to the club just to stand there and watch others around me danced their life away?” Although those were my thoughts, I couldn’t bring myself to say what I was thinking and the only words that came out my mouth was, yeah okay. Ignoring him and his stupid little attitude I danced like no other; forgetting he was even in the club and what he told me, I basically blanked out. Without notice he came out of nowhere, pulled my hair and dragged me off to yell at me and somewhat hit me. He would say, “Didn’t I tell your little stupid ass not to dance?” then he would hit me, Smack! My girls were ready to show down because they were worried about me and they didn’t like the way he treated me, so things was ugly at the club that night.

My boyfriend then, but ex-boyfriend now, and I fought in the club for about 20 minutes in the corner and on the dance floor, it was really embarrassing to get yelled at and hit on like I was his kid or something. When I got home that night I cried the whole night because I knew I had to leave him alone, but love wouldn’t let me go on about my business; every time I had the courage to leave, he’ll find a way to pull me back in. Anonymous called me apologizing saying it was my fault we got into a fight because I shouldn’t had danced after he gave me a warning. Sitting there looking at the phone with a dumb look on my face I couldn’t help but laugh because I was dealing with a lunatic, this relationship was hurtful, stressful and just plain ridiculous.

Developing a sense that the relationship wasn’t going so good; being treated like an unknown human made me realize that someone needed to set some standards and it was going to be me. Also I took the time out to explore and respect myself to find out who Ashley Calloway really is and why she let herself be treated the way she did. Sometimes as I reminisce about him and any other dumb relationship I had, it finally occurred to me that I didn’t want to be in any relationship, but I was looking for someone to replace my father. My father went to jail a long time ago and to fix that missing piece of the puzzle in my life I turned to the next best thing, guys.

On the other hand a very good lesson was learned and Ashley had a very good outcome of her experience on that relationship; she learned not rush into a relationship and take things slow. Also I have a little sister, I wanted to set some examples for her because I didn’t want her to go through the same thing as me and my family member had gone through. Going off to school to further my education and having long talks with Tyliqua, my sister, is a couple of examples I’ve set for her. She tells me that she wants to be just like me and I can see she’s following in my footsteps, so I have no choice but to be a big sister and lead her in the right direction.

So to sum it up, I can truly say there is much experience to share. Being a young female and forced to grow up I can give anyone advice on relationships. This relationship is the most and best experience I ever had in my young life because I learned from my mistakes, that way in the future I know what to look for in a man. Going through this relationship with Mr. Anonymous was like taking big steps in life, one thing I learned from this crazy relationship is: you have to choose what’s right for you and choose who is right for you. Having a rough relationship with this guy has opened my eyes to set an example for others so they won’t make the mistakes I made.

The four letter word!!!!

Love is nothing but a four letter word! I truly hate that I love him; it’s a deep kind of love too. When we first met we were inseparable, he was my peanut butter to my jelly!

After finding out he cheated on me with other girls, I was oh so heartbroken. Crying day after day and night after night, I realized I deserved better because my parents taught me to be strong and if I didn’t learn anything serious from my parents, one thing I did learn from them is never let a man bring you down.

Like a fool in love I came right back to him because if felt like I was leaving a piece of me behind. I eventually got pregnant by him and heard he had someone else pregnant also. Stress and pain was endured throughout my body and I truly believe he was the reason why I had a miscarriage; I was always stressed out by him. Being young and in love is not good at all for nobody.

Finally to sum it all up I am single and on my grind now. At first I didn’t care about anything or anyone, but the only thing I did care about was being with him. I didn’t understand the true meaning of love and now that I have much experience I do. Now that my eyes are open I want to help other people not make the mistakes I made. If you feel like you shouldn’t be in a hurtful relationship, don’t be scared to get out of it because it will be very helpful in the long run.

Be yourself don’t let some chump change who you are and make sure you know all the signs of a relationship going downhill. Think Smart!

Love stinks...

Just recently I've broken up with my ex-boyfriend of 2 horrible and wonderful yrs, but this isn't going to be the last time were going to break up. I mean I have a lot of love for this guy, but he's the type of guy you have to treat like your child due to him being abandoned and neglected as a child.

Every time we break up I know its not going to be the last time because he has the words to get me back into his world. This last time we broke up he cried his heart out to me and I've never seen him act like that before. So I been thinking maybe I should give him another chance and then again he's always getting chances from me because I hate to see people hurt especially if I was the one to cause them to hurt. My mom has been telling me from day one that I needed to get rid of him because she knows when a man is only out for himself and she told me to be careful around him too because he's controlling!

I didn't exactly knew what she meant until we really got deep into our relationship. Awhile back in the summer of '07 he got mad at me because I wouldn't do what he told me to do, I didn't do things he wanted me to do, and as we was arguing an image of my mother popped in my head telling me that he was controlling. I finally realized she was right but love is blind.

When someone like your mother or someone whose known you for a long time, if they warn you about something, take the time out and listen. It may seem like they're hating and showing some signs of jealousy, but it could be that they care about you very much and they just want what's best for you.

Relationships between friends...

My friends Leanne, Carmella, Jalisa, and Dottie are my inspirations. Sometimes I sit and wonder how I became best friends with these crazy girls. They are the true definition of friends and I’m glad they’re in my life.

When things aren’t right in my life, Jalisa is the one who I talk to about what’s going on. She understands where I come from and she listens to what I have to say. Jalisa is like a sister I never had, she doesn’t judge me either. When we met back in high school we was cool, but we didn’t start hanging out and getting real tight until we got in the 11th grade. We bonded like we known each other for ages. She is the friend one wishes to have in their lives.

My friend Leanne keeps me laughing; she is really funny and crazy. She is the friend I been longing for in my life because I used to be uptight and took things serious all the time. When I’m around Leanne she makes me forget about all the troubles going on in my life and I feel free with her. I can always go to her and get a good laugh when I’m down and out because she knows how to make a person be happy. When I got into an argument with my boyfriend in the past I thought about Leanne because I knew she wasn’t going to let me down, she had me splitting my sides because I was laughing so hard. After talking to her I noticed that I wasn’t thinking about him or that stupid argument we had.

Dottie is my big sister I never had. She is quite around people, but behind closed doors she is really goofy. Dottie and I met in high school like everyone else, but we started hanging out in 11th grade. She is similar to Leanne she keeps me laughing and she is something like a leader to me. If it wasn’t for her talking about staying in school, I wouldn’t have continued my next quarter at OSU-Newark because I was going to drop out.

Carmella is like my second little sister and she is also quite around people, but behind closed doors she is really funny. She is special to me because we both had a similar situation and when I talked to her about it she understood me and that made me feel good.

All of these girls are special to me, they are my sisters and they are my best friends. Our relationship between each other is tight and strong!

Love is like Lust

Relationships are hard to handle especially when your young and a female. When someone doesn’t know what their doing in a relationship its easy to loose your partner because your partner can easily be distracted by someone else. Relationships today are based on lust and just that, no getting to know one another before jumping into a relationship with a person. Love is funny because its a lot like lust and sometimes you can lust someone and think your in love.

Take it from me, awhile ago there was this guy I was seeing and all he wanted to do was have sex, instead of getting to know him better I did just what he wanted. He always told me how much I looked good and how much he wanted to get in my pants. Being young, dumb, and falling for his stupid lines I feel in love without knowing what love really means. Truly, I believed I loved him but after going through pain, hurt and having no trust in that relationship it finally occurred to me that what we had wasn’t love at all, but what we did have was lust.

Coming from a harsh relationship like that and being a young female I can honestly say I have much experience as an older woman. Seeing young girls being in relationships like that always remind me of the ones I been through and it hurt me because I know what they are going through. Assuming that no ones cares for them and thinking their boyfriend is the only one who truly does because they put little buds in their ear to make them feel good, I cant understand why girls want to be treated like that.

A couple of my friends where in and are in the same position I was in and they come to me with their problems. Coming from past experience, I shared my details and told them what I did to make sure I was suppose to be in that relationship.

To rap it all up and to make my point, Love is a lot like Lust. If your coming out of a relationship, don’t rush into another wait until you think your ready, if the person cant wait then they don’t need to be with you. Don’t base your relationship on sex because it will not turn out right, be respectful of yourself and who you are and if the person cant understand then they don’t understand you.

Ashley Calloway is my name and I attend The Ohio State University of Newark. In my English class we are to create blogs and talk about a specific subject over the next ten weeks. In my blog I plan on talking about giving good advice on relationships. Relating to many different relationships I have a lot of experience and wish to share with people on here. Each week there will be interesting thoughts and sayings that I hope will draw people in.

Have you ever had relationship problems with your boy/girl friend, family and friends? Do you wish there was something you could do to make it better? Well, I’m the person to give you the advice on how to better your relationship. Also I can take you through steps to better yourself so you can better your relationships.

Going through rough relationships myself, I have a lot of experience on many types; having problems with my siblings, my friends and the most important of all to me, boyfriends. Giving advice has been truly a blessing for me because it’s just something I was placed on this earth to do. As a child my friends would always come to me when they were in trouble and ask what should they do the next time around so they wouldn’t be in the same position as they were in now. My grandmother says she always seen something special in me because she said I would always try to help people out with my advice.

For the next ten weeks, I shall shower you guys with my advice on relationships. If there is something you just can’t understand I plan on helping you with your problems.